Now Even The Olympic Medals Are 'Aboriginal'!  I'm So Excited, I Threw My Dreamcatcher Across My Tipi!

By:  Rachel Marsden

After coming out with a Native American Olympic logo and mascots, the Vancouver Winter Olympics has unveiled the Olympic medals and they are – yes! – “aboriginal designed”. As a Canadian myself, I was so excited I threw my dreamcatcher across my tipi.

Just one question. Has anyone checked the list of Canadian athletes competing at these games? I’m assuming that three quarters of them will be Native Americans, in keeping with the theme, and national honour demands that at least two thirds of medal winners will be from aboriginal stock. (To make sure they are not culturally disadvantaged, “calm inducing” Native American plants won’t be considered a banned substance in the event that competitors wish to toke up before launching themselves down a mountain or across a sheet of ice with blades strapped to their feet.)

I’ll be watching, and if I detect even the slightest hint of “racism” I’ll be dragging everyone before a human rights tribunal. Held in a sweat lodge, naturally.